Free Step Dodge

He asked for tips not a story...

@Dark-truth calm down mate, he's just trying to help.

Sorry I just woke up I'm moody then and darkslay knows I love/hate him XD I still consider him as my friend though.

What Upsidedowngrunt said lol. Also, I eat when I'm upset.

@Darkslay I'm entirely justified in being angry at what I'm angry at, it's a situation where I'm still paying the consequences of an enormous mistake my mother made 4 years ago (gave $72k to a dating site scammer, had to kick me out of the apartment to get a paying roommate, has borrowed money and not paid me back).

And now it's looking like she's going to have to move in with me and my bf and I'm beyond furious and looking for some way to calm down.

That's rough Chap. :-/ Maybe eating some good food and just keeping to yourself can help? A large tub of cookie dough ice cream, a spoon, and my room always make my anger go away

^Horrible advice.

Lol, you're right Brute XD we don't want Chap turning into a couch potato, I keep forgetting their's a five year metabolism difference between us

I'm lactose intolerant so :/ And don't worry about my metabolism, my anxiety keeps me thin.

@Chapstick, you're more than justified in feeling angry, it's a common emotion humans MUST feel. However, you must not seek justification in external factors, as an example, people. When you do, you start to create grief and emotional gaps, gaps which you start to yearn other people amend to while we, as human beings, are in full capacity to deal with.

I was in not a similar, but in the same caliber of a situation about 2 years ago. I used to say ''we'll it ain't my fault, why do i have to get dragged into this shit as well?'' and the truth of the matter was, that i wasn't being dragged into it, i was dragging myself by caring of the repercussions of other people's actions instead of my own, in the end i adapted and accepted that change in my life.

About 3 months or so, i finally found out the reason for that whole crap circus that went on, and with it, some awesome news came along, i won't go into detail about it since i do consider it a very personal experience, but i'm in a way better place in my life now, and it all came from a situation i would've called hell on earth a few years back.

So, the advice is "Stop being bothered by your mother potentially living with you 24/7 because you shouldn't care about the repercussions of her actions and should adapt and accept the change"?

I wouldn't be buying that in his shoes.

That's your opinion, and that's fine. But the human mind fears change so much i can't possibly give a 100% guaranteed, be all end all solution to stuff like this, i'm just talking out of personal experience. If there's something i've learned in my lifetime is that what we call ''coincidence'', doesn't actually exist. Everything happens for a reason.

My lifetime experience indicates that acquiescence is the ultimate failure of human agency, and that if one wishes to improve something they must refuse to accept the unacceptable. The advantage of my approach is that it's also built upon cause and effect logic.

At this point it's not potential, it's inevitable because her alimony runs out in july. She drives me insane when I live with her and she'll be bringing her cat who pukes everywhere and flicks all the litter 2 miles out of the litter box (I love the cat but he can be annoying with that stuff).

I know this isn't coincidence, the reason this happened is some smooth talking guy who turned out to be part of a gun ring in the middle east (that's where the money went btw) tricked my insecure mother who chose to listen to a stranger over her whole family who begged her not to send money to him.

My statement doesn't involve acquiescence. Acceptance is not a tenet of adaptation, and vice-versa, acceptance is a step that comes after factorization and the consequencial adaptation, see? Cause, and effect. I'm not saying ''do the same thing i did'' that would be arrogant, i prefix this in my first statement when i said the process of adaptation is personal and mental.

Damn, that's a pretty messed up deal, best of luck, hope a fortunate event presents itself after everything's cleared out. At least you know the root of the problem, insecurity.